Ah sweet Telefund

Look what the catholic dragged in
This is me after a long day of work. Yeah, I look like shit. Shit wearing a suit. 

So the day began with waking up and ironing. I hate ironing. I left the house at 11:00AM and little did I know, the University is only ten minutes away from my hotel. The university is like a goddamn maze, I couldnt find where the building was and then finding parking was a bitch. I had to feed the meter $2.80, which I was told I'd be reimbursed for. [Portions removed due to extreme versions of truthiness] Training began, it was long and arduous, pages and pages of blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...you get the idea. We got surprise visit from one of the higher on ups. For anyone that has seen 1999's 'The Mummy,' he looked like a smaller version of Imhotep, in a button down and tie. The man was full of wit though, one of those fast talking intelligent people who can talk their way out of the gates of hell. Very cool guy, I'm glad that my professional relationship has gone beyond an episode of Charlie's Angels, him being Charlie. I've had many conversations with him during the hiring process, all of which were over the phone. We were talking when all of a sudden the theme song to Dawson's Creek was on the radio. For some inexplicable reason, I couldn't focus on what he was saying, all I could hear was "I dont wanna wait, for our lives to be over..." We met for 45 minutes and then as always, he had to dash back. Back to the lab again yo. I had training until 6:30, when the shift started. For anyone who is reading this and is aware of the T-fund, this place had 15 calling stations, they had those skinny ass monitors, unlike the chunky fuckin block like pieces of shit monitors we used at Stony Brook. The good ol' 3.0 screen came up and brought a smile to my face. I miss that screen. I was formally introduced to the fifteen brave souls that we're about to go into over the phone warfare. It was nice to be in front of people again. The PM found it strange that I didn't want a chair, I opted to stand and walk around, listening to people, talking to people, and addressing their concerns. I haven't opened up to these people yet, it was the first day, I dont want them thinking that I'm this cocky son-of-a-bitch whose gonna tell them how to do their business and then bounce in a week and a half. I'm gonna lose the suit tomorrow, it was annoying, hot, and unnecessary. I'll claim my title as white screen nazi here as well for the short time that I'm here. What was amazing was the level of trust at this T-fund, so much so that they didn't need to have their pledges verified, no matter how big or small they may be. Maybe its a Christian thing but the Supervisor said the word 'damn' and then immediately said 'Oops, I forgot, no cursing.' Ho-Lee-Shit, I better watch my mouth around these people. Oh snap diggity, this reminded me, this morning I woke up, I opened to side table to toss in some shit and what I found within was the Holy Bible. Those evil bastards. Oh yeah, Satanism I think isn't anti-Christian because you're acknowledging and embracing Satan, so basically, its Christian extremism...but I digress. As the shift was going on, I felt at home again, it was great. I'm getting paid way more to walk around as a Supervisor than some of you bitches. Boo-yah! I'm just kidding, this'll only last for a week and a half, then I get to become Manager. It'll be fun. The last half hour took forever though, you know how it is. I know, you know. I left the University and headed for Walmart to pick up some shower supplies. If I hadn't, then tomorrow I would have reeked. Walmart seems to be the main attraction here, the thing to do, I ran into a few co-workers at Walmart. People go to Walmart...to hang out. That's the kind of place this is. When people want to go to the movies, the mall, or to do something classy, they drive about an hour to Pittsburgh. So thankfully, I'm here for a short while, and then I go to Pittsburgh. This is nice though, the nothingness. Its quiet, peaceful, and a break from the busy city life. I come back to my sanctuary, to my pimp ass room, where I smoke, write, and then fall asleep in my giant bed. Speaking of which, I'm ass fuckin tired, it's time for bed.